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What my family needs to know: the complete list, organized by role and timeline

Your family needs five things in the first year: who to call and where key documents are, access to your accounts and property, your medical and funeral wishes, and clear executor authority under a will. Most of this cannot be gathered in one day. Building the list before an emergency, and keeping it current, is what makes the first week manageable instead of chaotic.

By the Omliva team · Published September 17, 2026 · Updated September 17, 2026

Omliva organizes practical information. This guide is general information for the United States, not legal, tax, financial or medical advice.

A short note before you start

This guide is general information for the United States, not legal, tax, financial or medical advice. Confirm state-specific details, like probate thresholds or safe deposit box access, with your state court's self-help site or an attorney.

Why "what my family needs to know" is bigger than a will

A will tells a court who gets what. It does not tell your spouse which bank you use, your executor where the life insurance policy is, or your children what you want done with your body. The National Institute on Aging groups these missing pieces into personal records, financial and legal documents, and medical wishes, and recommends keeping them together in one place (NIA, checked 2026-09-17).

This gap between knowing and doing is well documented: most people say sharing their funeral wishes matters, and most never do it (NFDA, checked 2026-09-17).

Who needs what: spouse, executor and children

Role What they need most When they need it
Spouse or partner Joint account access, insurance policies, mortgage and bills, your medical wishes, funeral preferences Immediately, often within hours
Executor or personal representative The will's location, a full asset and debt inventory, letters testamentary once appointed, tax records First two weeks through the first year
Adult children Emergency contacts, health care proxy and living will, where the safe deposit box and papers are, who the executor is First 48 hours through settlement
Agent under a power of attorney Nothing new after death; authority ends the moment you die (NIA, checked 2026-09-17) Stops at death, not during
Minor children's guardian Guardianship nomination in the will, school and medical contacts, life insurance beneficiary information First week

A spouse usually has the most existing access but still needs a written list, since grief makes details hard to recall. An out-of-state adult child may have almost none of that access and needs the list to be explicit.

The first week: what your family needs immediately

  1. Emergency contacts: closest family, your doctor, employer, and anyone who depends on you (a minor child, a pet, someone in your care).
  2. Your medical wishes if alive but unable to communicate: your living will, your health care proxy's name and phone number, and whether you are an organ donor. Organ donor registration is legally binding under the Uniform Anatomical Gift Act, and a family cannot override it once active (organdonor.gov, checked 2026-09-17).
  3. Funeral or burial preferences and whether anything is prepaid. Only about one in five people leave this in writing, forcing grieving families to guess (NFDA, checked 2026-09-17).
  4. The location of your will and any trust documents, and who you named as executor.
  5. Immediate cash access: which account pays the mortgage or rent and covers everyday bills. Joint accounts usually stay usable; accounts solely in your name may freeze once the bank learns of the death (CFPB, checked 2026-09-17).
  6. Where your Social Security number and certified death certificates will come from. The funeral home typically orders these and reports the death to Social Security (USA.gov, checked 2026-09-17).
  7. Who to call at your workplace, and whether you carry group life insurance or a pension through it.

The first month: what your family needs to settle in

  1. A full list of financial accounts: checking, savings, retirement, brokerage, and which are individual versus joint or payable-on-death.
  2. Insurance policies: life, health, home, auto and long-term care, with policy numbers and insurer contacts. If a policy cannot be found, the free NAIC Life Insurance Policy Locator searches participating insurers using the death certificate (NAIC, checked 2026-09-17).
  3. Property records: deeds, vehicle titles, mortgage or loan statements, and any storage units or safe deposit boxes. A bank will not open a solely owned safe deposit box for a spouse or child without letters testamentary, though some states allow one supervised opening to search for a will (Nolo, checked 2026-09-17).
  4. Digital accounts: email, banking logins, phone, cloud photo storage, social media and any password manager. Do not write the passwords themselves; note where the password manager is and who has the master key, or set up a legacy tool.
  5. Employer and government benefits: unused pay, group life insurance, pension survivor benefits, and the Social Security lump-sum payment, limited to a spouse who lived with the person and filed within two years (SSA, checked 2026-09-17).
  6. Recurring bills and subscriptions that need to be paid, paused or canceled.
  7. Contact information for your accountant, financial advisor and attorney, if you have them.

The first year: what your family needs to close things out

  1. Full inventory of assets and debts for the executor to report to probate court, if required. Rules vary by state; check your state court's self-help pages.
  2. Tax records: several years of returns, and what the executor needs to file a final return and, if the estate earns income, an estate return.
  3. Retitling instructions: what should happen to the house, vehicles and other titled property.
  4. A resolution of digital accounts: closed, memorialized or transferred, following each company's own process. This is covered in more detail in our digital legacy checklist.
  5. Final accounting and closing of the estate by the executor, following the process described in our executor checklist.

The eight categories of information every family needs

Organize what you leave behind into these eight categories.

1. People to contact

Immediate family, closest friends, your doctor, employer, attorney and financial advisor, and anyone who depends on you day to day.

2. Identity documents

Birth certificate, Social Security card, marriage or divorce papers, military discharge papers (DD-214) if you served, and passport.

Will, trust documents, power of attorney, health care proxy and living will. A power of attorney and health care proxy end at death; only a court-appointed executor can act after that (NIA, checked 2026-09-17).

4. Money and property

Bank and investment accounts, retirement accounts, real estate deeds, vehicle titles, and any business ownership papers.

5. Insurance

Life, health, home, auto, disability and long-term care policies, with policy numbers and how to file a claim.

6. Digital life

A list of your important online accounts (not the passwords), where your password manager is, and whether you have a legacy contact set. Apple's Legacy Contact lets a trusted person request access to photos, messages, notes and device backups with an access key and a death certificate, though purchased media and iCloud Keychain stay inaccessible (Apple Support, checked 2026-09-17). Google's Inactive Account Manager lets you name up to 10 trusted contacts and decide what each can receive if your account goes inactive (Google Account Help, checked 2026-09-17). Outside those tools, most states have adopted the Revised Uniform Fiduciary Access to Digital Assets Act, letting an executor request account access in order: the company's tool first, then your will or power of attorney, then a default rule (ULC, checked 2026-09-17).

7. Medical and end-of-life wishes

Your living will, your named health care proxy, and your organ donation decision. An advance directive is legally recognized but not always binding in situations it did not anticipate (NIA, checked 2026-09-17), so discuss it with whoever you name.

8. Funeral and burial wishes

Burial or cremation preference, service preferences, and whether anything is prepaid. Write it down even if you never discuss it aloud.

Where this information usually lives

Category Common location Risk if only there
Will and trust Attorney's office, home safe, or filed with the county Family may not know it exists
Passwords Password manager, browser autofill, or written down Not accessible without the device unlocked
Insurance policies Insurer portal, paper file, employer HR Lost policies require a locator search to track down (NAIC, checked 2026-09-17)
Safe deposit box Bank branch Inaccessible without letters testamentary in most states (Nolo, checked 2026-09-17)
Medical directives Doctor's office, hospital record, home file Emergency responders may not see it without a copy on hand
Digital accounts Apple ID, Google Account, email provider Legacy tools must be set up in advance, or access follows a slower process

Scattering this information across a house, an attorney's office and a handful of accounts is normal, and it is why families spend weeks reconstructing what one page could tell them. This is the kind of information a family guide keeps in one place, current as accounts and wishes change. Your guide walks through each category in short, guided sessions.

Printable "what my family needs to know" checklist

When to get professional help

Talk to an estate attorney if you do not yet have a will, health care proxy or power of attorney, or if your family situation is complicated (blended family, minor children, a business, property in more than one state). Talk to a financial advisor or accountant if your accounts, retirement plans or estate tax exposure are too complex for a simple list. For everyone else, this is something you can gather yourself over a few sessions; the harder part is usually starting, then keeping it updated.

Frequently asked questions

What is the most important thing my family needs to know if I die?

Where your will is and who you named as executor, since little else can happen legally until someone is appointed to act for the estate. After that, your family needs your medical and funeral wishes, and a list of accounts and property.

What information should I leave for my family in case something happens to me?

Contacts, legal documents (will, power of attorney, health care proxy), financial accounts and property, insurance, digital accounts and the password manager location, and your medical and funeral wishes. Organize it by category so whoever needs a piece can find it quickly.

Do I need to write down my passwords for my family?

No, and you should not write passwords in a document that might be seen by more people than you intend. Instead, note where your password manager is and who holds the master password, or use Apple's Legacy Contact or Google's Inactive Account Manager, built for exactly this (Apple Support; Google Account Help, checked 2026-09-17).

Can my spouse access our accounts right away if I die?

Joint accounts usually stay accessible. Accounts solely in your name often freeze once the bank learns of the death, and typically only reopen to an appointed executor with letters testamentary (CFPB, checked 2026-09-17). This is one reason to have this information ready ahead of time.

Does a power of attorney let someone handle things after I die?

No. A power of attorney and a health care proxy are valid only while you are alive, and both end automatically at death (NIA, checked 2026-09-17). After death, only the executor named in the will, once appointed by the probate court, may act.

How often should I update this list?

At least once a year, and after any major change: a new account, a move, a new grandchild, a divorce, a new health diagnosis, or a change in who you want as executor or health care proxy.

Where should I keep this list so my family can actually find it?

Somewhere durable and known to more than one person: a labeled folder at home, a copy with your attorney, or an account built to hold this information, so it does not depend on one person's memory or one drawer in one house.

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